The Roses (Part 2)

By Monica Shah

	A Rose (or Bully) by Any Other Name . . . If you see or know anyone being bullied at your school, tell someone about it. If you feel you are being bullied, tell a teacher or counselor, your parents, or even friends outside that clique. If it's easier to write about it, put your thoughts in a letter or your journal and show that to an adult you trust. There are no easy solutions to teen girl bullying, but the first step is to get yourself out of the isolated, vulnerable position the bullies put you in. A healthy way to help deal with the loneliness and stress that bullying brings out is to join a club or organization that interests you. You could also talk about it with your STUDIO 2B group. Or do some volunteer work—helping others often feels just as good as having someone help you. Carlie, feeling in need of new friends, went to a meeting of her school's International Society, a club that the Roses made fun of. To her surprise, she found the club members to be interesting, friendly, and fun. They were not "oddballs freaks” as Bethlin used to call them. In fact, Carlie began to realize that the Roses, with their cruel and exclusionary tactics, were really the creepy ones.

In the Roses, there is a hierarchy. The leader, the only recognized position, is Bethlin. Next in line is Jessica, who seems to have almost as much power as the leader. Carlie had thought that she and Zahara were equal in position — that is, until all this happened. Carlie guesses that Bethlin had never forgiven her for arguing with her. And then she had gotten the other girls tro align themselves with her to ostracize and torment Carlie.

Roses' Results

At one point, a large number of the Roses' friends received an e-mail from an anonymous account with a list of untruths about Carlie. As a result, Carlie stayed home from school for a week, miserable and in tears.

Carlie, who had invested much of her time and energy into cultivating and nurturing friendships with Jessica, Zahara, and Bethlin, now found herself alone and lonely. She didn't have many other friends, partially due to the Roses' rules about not hanging out with "non-approved girls." Carlie is trying hard to overcome her fear of going to school and having her former friends continue to ignore and exclude her. Although she's encouraged that they appear to have stopped actively torturing her, "I really don't understand what happened and why all of them suddenly started to hate me… no one would tell me anything," Carlie complained.

Roses Have Thorns

The Roses did not physically hurt Carlie, but their actions were perhaps even more painful. Most people picture a bully to be a big, burly boy who goes about physically intimidating and hurting others. The bullying tactics traditionally chosen by girls, however, are more frightening because they are much less obvious. Girl bullies are very creative and inventive in their methods of cruelty—powerful strategies of cliques, hierarchies, secrets, gossiping, silent treatments, making up rumors, and ostracizing.

*This story is true but names and identifying details have been changed at the request of "Carlie."