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Dr. M is the author of five advice books for tweens and teens. Her latest is Where Should I Sit at Lunch? The Ultimate 24/7 Guide to Surviving the High School Years. She enjoys dancing, reading, working out and talking with young people about the issues that concern them. She holds a Ph.D. in Developmental Psychology.
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Liz, a first-year college student, is the co-author of three books: Ask Dr. M and Liz; Getting to Know the Real You: 50 Fun Quizzes Just for Girls, and Girls: What's So Bad About Being Good? She loves to dance, paint, make collages, hang out with friends and, of course, give advice.
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Dear Dr. M,
There is a dance this Friday and it's boys ask girls and two people invited me. One's been my friend forever and the other I've been crushing on for like 3 years. I don't want to hurt my friend's feelings though. But I want to go with the other one. Should I say no to them both? What do I do?
—Jessica, 11, Michigan
Dear Jessica,
If you said "no" to both of them, you'd end up home while everyone else—probably including your friend and your crush—was having a fun time at the dance. That doesn't seem like a good solution to me. Follow your feelings. Say "yes" to your crush and find out if he's as great as you think he is, and explain to your friend that, much as you like him as a friend, he's not the guy you want to go to this dance with. Then show him how much this friendship means to you by suggesting something else that the two of you could do together.
—Dr. M
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