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Dr. M is the author of five advice books for tweens and teens. Her latest is Where Should I Sit at Lunch? The Ultimate 24/7 Guide to Surviving the High School Years. She enjoys dancing, reading, working out and talking with young people about the issues that concern them. She holds a Ph.D. in Developmental Psychology.
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Liz, a first-year college student, is the co-author of three books: Ask Dr. M and Liz; Getting to Know the Real You: 50 Fun Quizzes Just for Girls, and Girls: What's So Bad About Being Good? She loves to dance, paint, make collages, hang out with friends and, of course, give advice.
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Dear Dr. M & Liz,
Just like most teens, I experiment with drinking. The other night I went to a party and drank a little too much. From what I was told (I don't remember much of it) I was heavily intoxicated and "hooked up" with two guys. I'm lost and embarrassed by my actions. I don't know how to stop this drinking binge. This always happens, but I don't know how to control myself, or what I should do. Please help!
—Caitlin, 15, Kansas
Dear Caitlin,
You should know that many teens don't experiment with drinking, particularly at your age. The fact that you don't remember what happened means you had a "blackout," which is a definite danger sign. And, even worse, you say, "This always happens." But I am going to focus on a positive sign, which is that you're asking for help to stop your binge drinking. You need to tell your parents what's going on. They may be disappointed in you, and maybe even very angry, but they can get you the professional help you need—since you say you "don't know how to control" yourself. Another option, if you feel you really can't talk to your parents, is to talk to your doctor or a school nurse or guidance counselor, someone who can make sure you get the help you need. In the meantime, stop experimenting, which means not even one drink.
—Dr. M
Dear Caitlin,
I understand that you wanted to try drinking, but it seems like you're doing a bit more than just experimenting. If you can't control how much you drink and how you act when you drink, then you shouldn't be drinking at all. You really shouldn't be drinking at all anyway since you're underage, but especially because it seems like you can't drink in moderation. Next time you go to a party, try not to drink alcohol or at least limit yourself to only one drink. You can still have fun without being drunk, and you won't do anything that you might be embarrassed by later.
—Liz
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