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Dr. M is the author of five advice books for tweens and teens. Her latest is Where Should I Sit at Lunch? The Ultimate 24/7 Guide to Surviving the High School Years. She enjoys dancing, reading, working out and talking with young people about the issues that concern them. She holds a Ph.D. in Developmental Psychology.
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Liz, a first-year college student, is the co-author of three books: Ask Dr. M and Liz; Getting to Know the Real You: 50 Fun Quizzes Just for Girls, and Girls: What's So Bad About Being Good? She loves to dance, paint, make collages, hang out with friends and, of course, give advice.
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Dear Dr. M & Liz,
I have this one friend and she is always with her boyfriend, but the thing is that her boyfriend takes control, like he will tell her who she could hang out with and when. Do you think this is okay for her boyfriend to be like that?
—Ashley, 15, Pennsylvania
Dear Ashley,
It's too bad that your friend is allowing her boyfriend to control her actions. But doing something about it is up to her. You could try bringing up the topic in a casual conversation. Try to focus on the fact that your friend doesn't seem to have time to be with you because she's spending all her time with her boyfriend and you miss her.
—Dr. M
Dear Ashley,
It's definitely not okay for your friend's boyfriend to be so controlling. On the rare occasion when you're alone with your friend, express your concerns about her boyfriend. Encourage her to either talk to her boyfriend about his behavior or to use her actions to show him how unfair he's being. Whatever way she chooses to deal with her problem, you should support her in her decision, since that's what she needs most from you.
—Liz
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