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Dr. M is the author of five advice books for tweens and teens. Her latest is Where Should I Sit at Lunch? The Ultimate 24/7 Guide to Surviving the High School Years. She enjoys dancing, reading, working out and talking with young people about the issues that concern them. She holds a Ph.D. in Developmental Psychology.
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Liz, a first-year college student, is the co-author of three books: Ask Dr. M and Liz; Getting to Know the Real You: 50 Fun Quizzes Just for Girls, and Girls: What's So Bad About Being Good? She loves to dance, paint, make collages, hang out with friends and, of course, give advice.
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Dear Dr. M & Liz,
What do you say if your friend asks you if she's fat?
—Kelsie, 13, Ohio
Dear Kelsie,
Your friend either wants your honest opinion or she wants your reassurance that she looks good. It may be tough to figure out what she's really after. You might turn the tables on her and ask her what she thinks and why she's asking. If she wants your help in starting a diet, you could suggest that a doctor is the best source for that information. If she's feeling insecure about her appearance and would like some pointers, you could make some suggestions. The important thing is: don't lie, but do be sensitive to her feelings.
—Dr. M
Dear Kelsie,
I hate to tell you this, but your friend is probably not looking for an honest response. She wants a compliment and probably wants someone to assure her that she's not fat. You shouldn't lie outright if she is overweight, but you may need to avoid answering the question. In that instance, find something you can say that is honest and positive about her appearance.
—Liz
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