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Dr. M is the author of five advice books for tweens and teens. Her latest is Where Should I Sit at Lunch? The Ultimate 24/7 Guide to Surviving the High School Years. She enjoys dancing, reading, working out and talking with young people about the issues that concern them. She holds a Ph.D. in Developmental Psychology.
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Liz, a first-year college student, is the co-author of three books: Ask Dr. M and Liz; Getting to Know the Real You: 50 Fun Quizzes Just for Girls, and Girls: What's So Bad About Being Good? She loves to dance, paint, make collages, hang out with friends and, of course, give advice.
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Dear Dr. M & Liz,
My friend is mad at me because we both like the same guy, and he likes me. What should I do? I don't want my friend to be mad at me, but I REALLY like this guy. Should I stop liking this guy or should I stop being friends with my friend?
—Steph, 13, Maine
Dear Steph,
You don't have to choose between your friend and the guy you like. This situation requires an honest discussion with your friend in which you reassure her that you value your friendship and don't want a guy to hurt it. But keep in mind that it's up to the guy you and your friend are arguing about to decide who he likes, and that may change from one day to the next.
—Dr. M
Dear Steph,
Try talking to your friend, explaining that you really like this guy and that he likes you. Even if you don't end up going out with this guy, there's no point in your friend continuing to like him since he doesn't like her back, and you may need to tell her that. Remind your friend about her positive qualities and tell her that there will definitely be other guys out there for her. If your friend insists that you not go out with this guy because she'd be too hurt, respect her wishes and remember that there will be other guys for you, too.
—Liz
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